Things you shouldn't say to your wife while on a date after you've flirtatiously grabbed her ass:
Awh! C'mon! I've been going to body pump 3x/week for over a month now! Don't call me out on the spanx so quickly!
Well...I didn't take offense because we joke about spanx all the time (night spanx?! 30 rock ref?!) and I know he thinks I have a nice behind sans spanx, so I proceeded to devour a ton of delicious sushi!
Who knew there'd be amazing sushi in the mountains?